bad news is that my i got so frustrated and scared at work today that i had to say yes to working a rediculous schedule this october
i know that october is busy and they need the help, but if i say its literally phsycially impossible for me to be at the cafe at 11am on a sunday because that is the time my rehearsal in boston ends, THEN I MEAN ITS IMPOSSIBLE
but sakis just didnt understand. and i dont know if its a language barrier or what but he just kept repeating “but i need two girls here at this time, its too busy, i cant do both coffee and crepes” to which i responded with ” my rehearsal gets over at 11 in boston, i literally cant be here” and he would just repeat himself. until he pointed at another girls schedule and was like can you be here at 1 and work to close? and they way he expressed it was throwing his hands up very agressively and getting louder because he was frustrated so i said FINE OK FINE yeah i can do that ill just work on 3 hours of sleep whatever
and he probably didnt understand why i said, so what does it even matter
im lucky the other barista didnt mind trading with me. otherwise i would have been fucked.
the aggression that my boss puts out is so scary that im too scared to even quit, i feel like he would yell at me
and if there is something that makes me break down into tears and makes me relive my entire abused childhood, its if a tall older man raises his voice
like i work monday through friday with my like one trigger. great.
also this schedule means its gonna be really hard for me to see cute boy i want to date. when i told him, he said its ok, we’ll figure it out, which gives me hope. but im just frustrated that im trying to make something for myself and something dumb like this is getting in my way.
i will be working mon wed thurs fri sat sun. 8-1 all of those shits except for sun 1-6. and on top of my friday and saturday rocky shows, and a con coming up.
i might die
im mostly scared that my body will literally give up on me.
and if i get sick, im totally fucked.